I leave the radio set to holiday music all season long. When we're in the car together, I sing loudly and bop around to the music. He groans and rolls his eyes a lot. I'm not sure if it's me or the music.
Granted, my favorite Christmas carols are the likes of "The Little Drummer Boy," so maybe I don't have the best taste in holiday music. And I must admit that Eric's right; there are some pretty God awful songs out there. Even I have to change the station on occasion.
Which brings me to an exciting game of....
Question: What are the top five worst Christmas carols of all time???
He Says:
5. Happy XMas (War is Over)- John LennonAs a Beatles fan, I feel like I shouldn't hate this song as much as I do, but it's just really annoying.
4. (Tie) Christmas Don't Be Late and Grandma Got Run Over by a Reindeer
Both of these songs are like MacDonald's. When you're a kid, you think it's awesome, but as an adult, it's disgusting.
3. The Twleve Pains of Christmas
Need I say more?
2. All I Want for Christmas- Maria Carey
Cheesy 90's Christmas music at its worst!
1. Anything by Mannheim Steamroller
I hate to sound like a music snob, but in what world do electric guitars and orchestras go together??
She Says:
5. Last Christmas- Wham!4. Merry Christmas, Darling- The Carpenters
"The logs on the fire fill me with desire." Really, lady?! Really? Karen Carpenter, you get a "That's what she said!" for that one. Vomit.
3. Do They Know it's Christmas? - Band Aid
There are so many offensive lyrics in this song I'm not sure where to even begin. The whole thing wreaks of colonialism if you ask me. No Christmas?! Wait.....no snow?! That's horrific. Wait...Miami doesn't get snow either?! Get a bunch of rich white guys to write a song for the Floridians too! (However misguided, this song did raise A LOT of money for the crisis in Ethiopia, and that, my friends, is the only reason this song is not number one on my list.)
2. The Twelve Pains of Christmas- Bob Rivers
As if the "Twelve Days of Christmas" wasn't already obnoxious enough, they just had to add "Hangovers" to the mix.
1. The Christmas Shoes- New Song
I've said it before, and I'll say it again: I'd rather be hit in the face with a frying pan than listen to this song. It's like someone took the Lifetime Network, a sick puppy, Oprah's ovaries, and country music and put them in a blender together to create this song.
P.S. I'd just like to point out that I have both "All I Want for Christmas" and "Happy XMas, War is Over" on my Ipod, and I listen to them daily. I also happen to have the Mannheim Steamroller version of "Carol of the Bells." Suck it, Eric. Merry Christmas, ho, ho, ho!
Now it's your turn: What Christmas songs do you find most obnoxious?
Since I consider myself an expert due to the amount of xmas music I listen to, I'll weigh in on this one too. I agree with Eric about anything Mannheim Steamroller - yuck! But, All I Want for Christmas is my favorite! I also cannot stand the Christmas Shoes song. I have a new one for your list too, Christmas Day by Dido. Out makes no sense and I hate it! There are a lot of bad songs, but so many good ones too! I just love to sing in my off key way to them!
ReplyDeleteThe Boston Pops 'Sleigh Ride' is my fav ever. But if I hear that calypso version of 'Mary's Boy Child' one more time I fully convert to Judism in order to escape its' wrath.
ReplyDeleteLol, Mary's boy child! Bwahahah. That's a good one. I've never heard Dido's Christmas, but unless it's been remixes by eminem, I'm not interested.
ReplyDeleteSummer, do you remember the Christmas that you gave me Mr Hankies Christmas Classics?? It was my very first cd with a "Parental Advisory - Explicit Content". Some of those tunes deserve to be on your list. :-0
ReplyDeleteNo, Bob, those are GOOD Songs, not bad ones.
ReplyDeleteNote the difference between "bad" and "naughty", Bob!
ReplyDeleteAgree! I find "Do they know it's Christmas" incredibly offensive. I also hate "The Christmas Shoes". I don't have respect for songs that are written solely to make you cry. My Mom says that listening to songs like that is "emotional bulimia".
ReplyDeleteMy top five would include the two mentioned above and "Santa Baby" (made for high-maintenance girls, plus grown women singing in baby voices is just horrible), "I saw mommy kissing santa clause" (gross), and "Baby it's cold outside" (because "no" means NO!)
Great post!!!