I thought last year's New Year's Eve celebration from our couch was pretty pathetic, but it got worse. This year, we weren't even conscious. And sadly, our sorry state was not due to too much champagne. Rather, it's a side effect of parenting.
I felt like garbage all night due to a clogged milk duct and the chills. (File under: Glamorous Breastfeeding Stories.) Then, after swaddling Vivi for the night, Eric and I both passed out around 10:30. She woke me to nurse a few minutes after midnight...so we missed the whole thing.
In spite of our lack of enthusiasm, we're starting 2014 off with some big changes...hello, we just had a baby. I'm also taking a leave of absence from work for the remainder of the school year to stay home with my girls.
We sent Madeline to daycare for the last time on Tuesday. It was a bittersweet experience waving goodbye to everyone.
She's been going to the same center since she was three months old, so more than once, I've worried about whether or not we're doing the best thing keeping her home. She learns so much at school. She has friends there.
Yet, she claims that she's not sad to leave, and seems excited to be staying home with me and Vivi. I think she was feeling left out when we sent her to school last week while we stayed home. Of course, settling into a new routine will take some time. It's going to be a big period of adjustment for Maddie Bear.
Meanwhile, I am thrilled to have the opportunity to stay home with my kids. This is probably the only span of time where I'll get to be a full-time mom, and I'm looking forward to it.
At the same time, I'm a little bit overwhelmed by the thought of juggling a Maddie Bear and an infant. I have no idea what I'm doing. Both girls demand a lot of attention, and I want to give them all the love and support they need to grow.
I know ultimately it will work out fine, but in the meantime, I need to figure out how to get both girls safely in the car in busy parking lots. Or what to do when Vivienne is crying in one room while Madeline is asking to go potty upstairs. Managing a headstrong toddler and a needy baby will be an interesting challenge.
Therefore, my goals for 2014 are all related to my new role as a stay at home mom to two children.
1) Get out of the house on a regular basis.
It's intimidating bringing two girls out into the world on my own. Plus, it's cold. It seems easier to just stay home, but I know for the mental health of all parties involved, we need to get out as much as possible.
2) Keep Madeline Engaged
I've got some projects lined up for Madeline. We'll also be hitting up every story time and indoor playground within a fifteen-mile radius. It's going to be hard going from the fast-paced world of preschool to watching baby sister eat ten hours a day. I've got to keep life interesting for her.
3). Be as Patient as Possible
With Madeline, with my new loaf of bread, with my husband, and with myself. This is going to be hard sometimes...okay, probably a lot of the time...and I need to be okay with that. I have to remind myself to go slow and to take a deep breath before I react. And if we have a horrible day where I utterly fail at parenting, I need to take a deep breath with myself and start over fresh the next morning.
So, here's to new adventures in 2014!
No comments:
Post a Comment