Dear Maddie Bear: January, 2014

Dear Madeline,

We are so proud of you, big sister!  Over the past three weeks, you've adjusted to life with Vivienne beautifully.  

Of course, there have been some small bumps in the road...You are three.  For example, you were more likely to meltdown in a puddle of tears when you didn't get your way the first week or so.  Yet, these bumps have been minor, and you've accepted Vivi into our family without any resentment or hurt feelings. 

Oh, how you love that baby sister of yours, Madeline.  Your heart is so big.  You want to give her so many kisses and hugs that we have to remind you to allow her some space.  

Meanwhile, I'm trying so hard to be a good Mumma for you, and I hope I'm not failing as miserably as it feels sometimes.  I knew things would change once Vivienne arrived, but I wasn't prepared for such a drastic shift.  Between the feedings, fussing, and lack of sleep, I fear that I don't have much to offer you.  

Besides, you're not the same girl that you were before Vivienne was born.  You were my baby, and suddenly, you're such a big girl.  Your hands seem huge in mine.  I'm not sure if you really have matured, or my perception of you has shifted.  It's probably a bit of both.  Even though we've been spending every day together, I miss you, my Maddie Bear.  I miss the way things were.  

You don't complain about the lack of attention, and you're happy to be a big sister. But sometimes your eyes seem a bit sadder, and I know your feelings get hurt when I can't drop everything to play with you.

I just hope you know how much I love you and how much time I spend thinking and worrying about you.  We'll fall into a good routine soon, and there will come a time where neither of us will be able to remember life without a little sister.  I'm thankful that you're being so patient with me as I figure out how to be a Mumma to two.  

I know having a baby sister who can't even play ball in the hallway yet isn't easy.  Thank you for being our awesome Maddie Bear. Vivienne is so lucky to have you.  Mumma and Dada are so lucky to have you.  

Love You to Pieces,

Mumma